It's All Over Now
by Pale Winter
Summary: One decision, one moment. The breakdown of a marriage. And the final, painful goodbye. InuxKag
1. Chapter 1

_****_

Well, it's all over now

_**We're through somehow**_

_**Too bad, I couldn't solve your riddle in time**_

_**It's all over now**_

_**

* * *

**_

The chill in the breeze was unnaturally bitter that night.

'_Or maybe it's not the cold that's bitter…'_

Kagome stood at the entrance to her modest home, leaning against the doorframe with her head resting on the wood's unforgiving edges. She was alone, completely, and utterly alone tonight. The hut was secluded in the forest, near the ancient well. The once welcoming privacy of the forest's depths now seemed oppressing. Even the hums of the night's creatures were dulled. Kagome gripped her thin robe closer to her fragile body. How could it be so cold in the middle of the summer?

Her teeth chattered, the pinching sound of enamel hitting enamel echoing in the front room. Her tired eyes closed as she breathed deep, taking in the pine and soil rich scents of the feudal era. With a sigh, the young miko from the future released the bamboo mat covering of the door and slipped back inside. The air was stale with misuse.

'_I've never wanted anything other than his happiness…'_

Her dull eyes stared helplessly at the chest in the corner of the one bedroom wooden home. The brown depths of her listless orbs sparkled slightly as she opened the lid. Inside were her most precious belongings. The white wedding robes Sango so painstakingly sewed for her, Shippou's drawings, and pictures of her family. Kagome fingered the cool silken cloth of the white robes. The corners of her mouth tweaked up in a sad smile.

'_I was so happy that day…so…unbelievably happy.'_

Digging to the dusty bottom Kagome pulled out her old and horribly tattered yellow backpack. The memories it held were precious, forever ingrained in every tear and every stain. She took the worn bag and carefully began gathering what was most dear to her, what belonged to her and her alone. Kagome wrapped the pictures of her smiling family in the midst of her day yukatas. She never did see them again, after falling through for the final time two years ago. After a painful three year separation, her family understood. It seemed so worth it then, to give up everything in the future to live out her life in the past. She should have known. The past, as it were, was meant to remain the past. She should have learned to let go.

'_Maybe then I wouldn't be in such a mess…'_

Her bitter thoughts quickly ran out of steam. She never could hold a grudge.

'_No. I wouldn't change what happened for the world. Only maybe, if it had been possible to hold onto this feeling a little bit longer…'_

Kagome slowly folded the rest of her clothing, all timeless like her. She long ago gave up her futuristic apparel. The miko looked like she belonged in this era all along. Carefully slipping Shippou's drawings in the side pocket, she gathered up the remaining blunts of his crayons. Only an inch of blue and a few stubs of red and yellow were left. A few pieces of jewellery were tossed inside, her comb and the last block of soap she owned. She stuffed the extra silk blanket they owned on the top to cushion everything precious within. Slowly, Kagome closed the chest, leaving Sango's handiwork behind.

'_It would be too painful…I'm sorry Sango…I know you worked so hard on it…'_

Lastly, with barely constrained tears glistening and threatening to spill over her lashes, the few small articles of clothing she had begun to sew were tucked safely inside. Kagome buckled the bag, its zipper long since broken. With a final round through the house, her fingers touching the splintered wood of the east wall, the thin paper of the shoji windows they'd painstakingly sewn together, and the cool metal of their belongings, Kagome whispered her silent goodbyes. Her foot brushed against the heavy comfort of their futon. She bit her lip to hold in the whimper.

It felt like leaving a part of her behind. Truthfully she didn't know exactly what she was going to do. Where she was going to go in the end. But she knew she had to leave. Sango and Miroku would no doubt take her in. Until she managed to get back on her feet, she knew she had a place in their home. Desperate was her need to seek refuge there. In the comforting arms of her family.

* * *

In the cover of darkness Kagome planned her escape. She wanted to be as subtle as possible, and make the transition as gentle as she could. It was well past two in the morning, and everything was still within in the night. She picked up the heavy bag with a grimace and cradled it against her side. Carefully slipping on her wooden sandals, Kagome parted the bamboo covering and slipped outside. She gasped, and dropped her bag.

"Inu…yasha…" she whispered faintly.

His eyes snapped to attention. The eerie golden glow fiercely processing the scene before him. Why was Kagome up so late? Why was…was that her bag? A gripping sense of foreboding flushed through his body. Adrenaline kicked into high gear as his fear all but rippled through him.

"Kagome?... What the fuck do you think you're doing out here so late!" his harsh growl broke the silence of the forest.

He took a step forward, and Kagome stepped back, clutching her rounded belly protectively. Her eyes, wise beyond her years, took in his appearance. His dishevelled hair, messy clothing, and kiss swollen lips. The panicked look of guilt condemned him.

"Inuyasha…" she whispered painfully. Her eyes watered, tears trickling down her pale cheeks. She knew. She knew as soon as he left her side that night. But the evidence of it all was too hard to bear.

"Look, Kagome-" he reached a clawed hand forward, desperate for her to understand. Kagome shrunk back. The frightened look searing him to the core.

"I don't want to know." she said plainly, words squeezed painfully through her parched throat.

"It didn't mean anything!" he cried with wide, disbelieving eyes. Acidic guilt clawed at his insides. He relished in the pain.

"When you brought her back with the jewel…I thought it was over between us." her eyes were downcast as she slowly bent to pick up the straps of her bag. "But then, you chose me, and made me the happiest person in the world Inuyasha." He gritted his teeth as he fought the urge to pounce and grab her in his embrace. "Two years…" she mumbled, "we've been married two years, did you know?"

"Of course I fucking know!" he spat. The dirty regret manifesting into his anger. He was enraged with himself. But Kagome always got the brunt of it.

"I would have done anything for you. Anything Inuyasha."

"Then stay!" he cried. Inuyasha fell to his knees and inched forward. Kagome watched him warily through her bangs. His trembling hands slowly cupped the protruding belly of his mate. "I swear Kagome, it didn't mean a fucking thing. It just happened once! And it'll never happen again, I swear it!"

A gentle hand soothed his messy hair.

"The only thing I can't do for you, not anymore, is let you walk freely between me and her. You can't hold me in the day and crawl to her in the dark of night Inuyasha!" Kagome's deadly whisper ripped his heart apart. He knew it was a fucking stupid thing to do. But he wasn't thinking. It had just seemed so natural at the time. The urge, the need.

"No, I swear, Kagome, I swear. I'll never so much as look in the same direction as her again. Just stay, please, just stay!" his whine splintered her resolve the tiniest bit. His cheek rested painfully tender upon her belly, his ears twitching to catch a sound of the life held within.

"It's fate." she stated calmly, gently prying his hands from her. "We've toyed with it as long as we could. You were meant to be with her Inuyasha. I know you tried, and that's enough for me."

"No! You stupid wench! Listen to me! I never wanted her! Just you! O-only you! Tonight…" he growled as she backed away, his head falling in remorse, "it was, a mistake! A stupid fuck up!"

Kagome shook her head sadly. Her small smile pained him. He could handle anger, rejection, anything vile she could throw at him. He wanted her to blame him for his depraved infidelity. But the gentle understanding in her eyes froze his blood. He couldn't live without her, he just couldn't.

"You'll never be able to resist her pull for long Inuyasha. I can't bare the thought of having to turn the other way every year, two years, ten? It doesn't matter. I can't love you as much as I do," her sob made his stomach drop, "…and willingly let you lie in another woman's embrace."

"Kagome…" he whined. With a deep breath, Kagome bundled the bag on her side again. She swiped her face with the back of her hands and cleared her throat.

"You can-" she faltered slightly, "see the baby whenever you want." the quiet whisper turned his world upside down. "All that I ask is that you love him or her. They were conceived with love, and it shouldn't know anything else, no matter what happens between us." Inuyasha looked up, hurt flashing across his features in a palpable throb.

"I'm not letting you go!" he roared suddenly, shaking the leaves on the branches of the trees.

"Inuyasha…" with her free hand she caressed his flushed cheek tenderly, her thumb smoothing over the swollen lips he used to kiss another, "be happy."

The muscles in his jaw spasmed. He clenched his teeth tightly together to keep the cry of utter despair from echoing forth. The unwelcome burn behind his eyes felt dry and scratchy.

"I'm sorry, I'm so fucking sorry Kagome!" his last desperate plead tightened her throat.

"Me too."

* * *

Generally, I'm a happy-ending kind of person. But something about this blistering cold and mountainous pile of homework (stopping to write this fic didn't help in the least, haha) set me on edge. Hopefully it wasn't too terrible. I've taken a long break from fiction writing.

I purposely left it allusive so you could come up with your own reasons for his betrayal. But if you're like me, no matter how creative I get, I still like a solid answer from the author. Basically, it takes place five years after the journey is completed. Kagome stayed her three in the future, and Inuyasha waited. The deviation from the manga starts then. I'm going with the idea that Inuyasha kept the jewel (that became a physical object again) and wished Kikyou back to life, kind of a way for him to repent his sins. But he waited for Kagome faithfully, and stayed true until this night. His reasons for the infidelity? I think he tries as hard as he can, and truly loves Kagome, but Kikyou has some sort of power over him that he'll never be able to push away.

Oh and I totally forgot. I in no way own Inuyasha.

It's All Over Now, by The Perishers


	2. Chapter 2

Inuyasha looked on with sombre eyes. Kagome gave a gentle smile as Shippou squeaked with excitement.

"I can feel it!" the kit's distant cry pierced his heart.

A weight had settled on his shoulders since that night. He tried to rationalize it, deny it, anything to settle that nauseating feeling. But no matter what he did that gnawing _guilt_ ate at him from the inside out. He fucked up and he knew it.

* * *

"_Inuyasha..." _

"_Listen, you keep it." The word wench nearly rolled off his tongue before he could contain it. The pained look in her eyes made him realize she missed it too. "I-it's yours. I built it for you." _

_With a sob Kagome covered her eyes and gleaming cheeks with her voluminous sleeves. She hadn't wanted to cry, but the emotions were overwhelming her. Whatever tiny shred of hope Inuyasha held sparked viciously to life. She hurt too...maybe there was still hope? He desperately wanted to reach out and console her, to calm her acidic tears and make all her pain disappear. But how could he when he was the very source?_

"_Where-" her muffled plea began._

"_I'll figure it out. I always do." _

_Kagome looked up with teary eyes. Inuyasha swore internally. How could he have done this to her? How could he have caused her so much anguish? He was supposed to protect her dammit! The demon inside him thrashed and howled. It hurt for him, hurt for his mate. Dim golden eyes looked longingly at the woman who cradled his heart in her gentle hands. What had she ever done but sacrifice for him? _

_A silent moment passed between the two as the each evaluated how far they'd fallen. She wanted to ask him why. Why he went to her, why she wasn't enough for him. The questions were desperately clawing their way to the surface but she forced them down. She knew he hurt too. _

_

* * *

_

Kagome giggled as Shippou's swishy tail twitched back and forth. Inuyasha felt his stomach drop at the sound. It had been a month since he heard that near musical laugh. Hidden behind the lush, late summer brush Inuyasha silently watched as the mother of his child entertained the other inhabitant of her home.

"What's happening?" Shippou asked excitedly.

"The baby has hiccups, the poor thing." Her gentle, maternal murmur made it hard for Inuyasha to breathe. He should be there to soothe his own pup. _'Fuck...'_

"How much longer Kagome?" Shippou asked with wide, hopeful eyes. The young mother to be bit her lip to contain her silly smile and kissed the top of Shippou's head.

"Kaede-bachan says it won't be more than a couple weeks now." Shippou grinned and climbed onto her lap, his small hand possessively covering her swollen belly.

"I'll be the best big brother ever Kagome." His serious tone and childish conviction made warmth blossom in her heart.

"You'll protect him or her right?"

"Of course," he admonished, "especially since Inuyasha's gone now."

* * *

Inuyasha held his breath to prevent the whimper from escaping. He fell against the rough bark of the tree behind him and slid to the ground. Claws gripping the dirt beneath him, Inuyasha swore inwardly. He could smell the sharp spike in Kagome's scent. Her features remained passive but her scent gave away her true feelings.

He remained hidden for the remainder of the day, sitting limply at the bottom of the giant oak and listening to the bustle inside the house. On some level, he believed Kagome knew he was close. She always had an uncanny knack for sensing his presence. They never acknowledged one another and he oddly preferred that. He wasn't ready yet. He had exhausted every possible excuse within his own battles. Nothing was a good enough reason for her. He simply fucked up.

It happened gradually, the affair. Inuyasha snorted to himself. He doubted it even counted as an affair. They started talking, about mundane things really. Never in secrecy, never truly alone. He didn't hide it, and Kagome knew they had started a more friendly relationship than the distant one they maintained before. Kagome was supportive, naturally, and saw it as progress. _'It's okay Inuyasha, don't be silly. I don't mind!'_

Then one day Kikyou brought up the what-ifs. It made his head spin, reopened old wounds. He lashed out at first, repulsed by the very thought of another life. He hadn't spoken to her for nearly a week after that incident. But once he saw her weary eyes gazing at him in apology, he slinked back and they starting talking once more. This time, at least in the beginning, he wasn't as eager to divulge the rekindled friendship to Kagome.

They remained proper, never touched and never veered into inappropriate territory. Their weekly conversations soon became daily. He didn't think much of it. It never affected the time he spent with his wife so it didn't warrant any real cause for concern in his view.

Then when Kagome was nearly seven months along Kaede forbade Kagome and him to lie with one another. It made him edgy at first, but Kagome took it with humour. He thought she was insufferable. She thought he was insatiable.

* * *

"_Inuyasha!" her feminine giggle didn't help matters any. "Stop! You __know what Kaede said! It's bad for the baby." _

"_I'm not doing anything." He murmured from the crook of her neck. _

"_You are too! Quit it before you get yourself all worked up!" Inuyasha crawled up her body, nudging her nose with his. _

"_Too late." He grinned. _

_His lips grazed her cheekbone before settling to suckle the tender flesh of her neck. Kagome hummed beneath him, gripped his bare shoulders to anchor herself. _

"_I-Inuyasha..." her breathy sigh ignited a fierce desire within him. "W-we can't..."_

"_I know wench, just shut up," his knuckle grazed her folds, "I just wanna take care of you." Her deep moan stiffened him. _

"_Fuck woman..." _

_

* * *

_

Kagome did the best she could to sate her husband. But fate played in a cruel way. The rounder she got, the less she was allowed to do. But as her belly grew, Inuyasha found her irresistible. He craved her, was desperate for her touch.

That night had been like every other. He lay beside his wife and held her as she snoozed. But as he inspected her in the pale moonlight his skin grew feverish. He had kissed her temple, that much he remembered. Then left the hut with the intention of just getting some air.

What happened next was a series of coincidences. But that wasn't a good enough excuse was it? He wasn't thinking when he stumbled across her at the river. Why the fuck was she there so late anyways? He felt drugged by his desires and the urge had felt so natural. She looked like her. The irony of the situation was devastating.

The what-ifs, coupled with his blind need, still made a pathetic excuse. But it happened and she knew before he even made it home. He didn't know if he planned on hiding it. Didn't know which was crueller – telling his pregnant wife of his indiscretions, or lying to keep her happy. But Kagome was always perceptive. And that night, his heart shattered along with hers.

* * *

"Inuyasha." A quiet voice whispered. Said hanyou rubbed his scratchy eyes and sat up straight.

"Wha-" he murmured incoherently.

"Kagome's already asleep. You should probably leave now."

Blurry golden eyes inspected the sombre kit before him. Shippou didn't even bother to pester him anymore. For some reason, that hurt the hanyou. Inuyasha cleared his throat and scratched the back of his neck uncomfortably. The two stared at one another for a few moments, simply soaking in the familiarity. With a nearly inaudible sigh Shippou turned towards the direction of the hut. After a few paces he paused. Without turning he whispered,

"I know you didn't mean to hurt her Inuyasha." The hanyou remained silent. "It sucks to grow up without a dad." Without further explanation or direction, Shippou left Inuyasha to ponder his own fate.

* * *

I came across this story completely randomly. I felt the need to expand on Inuyasha's pain and to tell his side of the story. Hopefully you enjoyed it.


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